I feel played

Dear jenna
i am writing to you because i saw your page on yahoo answers. i have always loved getting advice from you when you would answer my questions because you were the only person who was upfront and forward with me. I have a new problem now though. i really like this guy and i feel like he plays me. in the beginning it was all amazing and it felt like nothing could go wrong and i fell for him really really hard. Now its just on and off communication and misunderstandings. i feel like he has gotten what he wanted and now he is moving on. i really don't know what to do because i really like him, like i think i love him, he took my v-card and we still talk but not as much. and sometimes he ignores me and its really getting me upset. its only a matter of time before im just another girl in his life that means nothing to him. i would do anything for him so why doesnt he feel the same towards me? i really thought we made a huge connection that 2 weeks that we hung out together and i thought for sure that i would be his girlfriend in no time. We never made anything official and i feel used and mistreated. i really like him though and i don't wanna be the first to text him because i dont want him to think that i am crazy or desperate. i havent spoken to him in almost a week. i just want him to approach me first because i am always the one approaching him first.. and its starting to make me feel like the only reason he is talking to me is to be nice because i am making the first moves but he doesnt want any relationship or anything.. its kind of hard to tell and its really confusing me.. please help?
~Kayla


Dear Kayla
Well, stop in the name of love! You think you "love" him? Well, it may be the case, but that may be because he took your "v-card." These types of situations are always taking place around us, you are not the only one. Actually, I have had to deal with a situation like this in the past as well. The best thing to do is ignore it. Why? well because that's the best revenge. It's hard, it's like when a teacher tells you to ignore someone at school who is being a complete jerk, but I'm going to tell you why right now, and trust me, it's a lot easier to ignore the guy you are completely head over heals for rather than an annoying classmate at school. Have you ever heard of the staples easy button? Or any button for that matter, maybe even a Christmas toy that's supposed to sing and dance when you press it's hand. If you press it's hand and it sings that's what you want.. but if you press it's hand and it doesn't work you get frustrated and you start pressing every single toy until you find one that works.. correct? Well that's what people that pick on you do.. they try to "push your buttons" to get a rise out of you.. it's what they want! So you remain silent and it pisses them off to the extreme. This crush of yours is probably enjoying the fact that you can't get enough of him. Guys are pigs, not all of them.. but most of them. Girls tend to fall a lot faster then guys do.
here's what you do: STOP TEXTING HIM! Once he sees that you are no longer texting him.. he's gonna be a surprised and upset. When you see him around, don't make eye contact unless he makes it with you, or make eye contact and just shoot him a friendly smile and go about your day. If he says hello, then you can say hi back. The point is that you have to show him that you are fine without him, and that this whole game he is playing really isn't effecting your life style. Even if it may be effecting it.. you can't let him see that. He has to see that you are still a happy girl and that you don't let those silly games ruin your fun.. and that is the best revenge there is. Then maybe he will be texting you first. It seems to me though that he might be your first true crush. If that's the case and even if it isn't, there will always be other people out there. He probably won't be the one you will marry and spend the rest of your life with. You can't waste time thinking about that though when there are other great guys out there for you that won't make you feel used, unwanted, or unimportant. Don't settle for less then you are worth. Go for it and meet new people. Sooner or later he will be just some guy that you used to like and care about, and he will be the one sitting there thinking that he really did mess up with you and he will regret it, and he will most certainly miss you. I hope this helps.
-Jenna